So the Oral Fixations cassette is in. The blog is on hiatus while I pretend to be a good ivy leaguer and hand in my masters thesis. I’ll post the insert PDF and full track list soon, along with the help of Adam from icoulddietomorrow.

They’re super pretty: velum, lazer cut cover, and nice tiny booklet. 

  • For now you may order it through Vinyl Rites records here. 
  • OR, if you’re in NYC, we can do the secret handshake and I’ll give you one. Coffee works too. 

  • OR, you can write me a letter, trade me a mix, or do any of those cool things you use to do when you were 17. So if you’re up for that: an.audio.zine@gmail.com.
Sometimes you get a reputation. Click for high-res photo

Sometimes you get a reputation.

Okay, so Vinyl Rites Records of Gainesville Florida (Dead Friends, The Men, Mekhago NT, Religious as Fuck, Nomos, etc…)  is releasing The Oral Fixations Cassette pretty soon (pressing 300). It’s 2 hours of good stuff not posted here - much more polished than what appears on this blog (polished in the loose sense of the word). There will be a casette tape release party sometime in October in Brooklyn… Right in the Familys Jewels (Amanda!) has laser cut the fancy schmancy covers for us tonight, and the booklets/velum should be done soon. Pretty excited…. More to come. Click for high-res photo

Okay, so Vinyl Rites Records of Gainesville Florida (Dead Friends, The Men, Mekhago NT, Religious as Fuck, Nomos, etc…)  is releasing The Oral Fixations Cassette pretty soon (pressing 300). It’s 2 hours of good stuff not posted here - much more polished than what appears on this blog (polished in the loose sense of the word). There will be a casette tape release party sometime in October in Brooklyn…

Right in the Familys Jewels (Amanda!) has laser cut the fancy schmancy covers for us tonight, and the booklets/velum should be done soon. Pretty excited….

More to come.

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You’re 9 and you wake up in the middle of Tokyo traffic, having just been hit by a cab like a bowling pin. On crutches with a massive leg cast, you now have to deal with the wrath of your fellow school girls. A story of milk-runs gone bad, drills, and being stranded in your classroom. A Japanese noir story by Taeko. 

Recorded August, Brooklyn, NY 2010

Coming soon, a first hand account by the only straight edge kids attending the Raid reunion. And, respectively, a voicemail of an lackluster acid trip.

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lylynn:

whenthennow:

so is this. why did no one like this? you like that stupid map but not solid punx satire? fuck yall

I diedddd!!!

The life of some inside jokes goes so far.

A Note on the Origins of the SQRM Trash Bag T-Shirt.

Several months ago my old friend from Amherst, Geoff Miller, rode his scooter to the SQRM show at my house (then, Stolen Sleeves Collective). It was cold as shit and being the utilitarian he was, he wore a garbage bag as an extra layer of wind-resistant clothing. [Mind you, this is a guy who built a secret foldable cot into his workbench so he can sleep in his shared industrial studio somewhere on N10th St. rather than a real house - shhhh]. Metal Mike (recorded here), the drummer of SQRM, joked that the band should make shirts out of trash bags instead. Youth Attack Records took him up on the challenge, quickly selling out of the infamous, silk-screened trash bag shirts. A punk rock meme was born, as well as $100 Ebay exchanges. 

Here is Geoff’s account via my voicemail - the audio is a little choppy, but “oral history” don’t need to be pretty.

Recorded in Brooklyn, NY, August, 2010.

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Rapmetal as salvation.

What happens if you were in an existential rut, and instead of finding connection to a religious ideology, or even a subculture (like so many of my friends did), you found salvation in a washed-up,1990s rap-metal band?

Johnny is a coffee shop manager in Jacksonville, FL, and this is the depressing story about a woman he works with, who found that the rap metal community worked for her.

I really thought about posting a picture of 311, but the idea of a picture of 311 greeting people to this blog bummed me out too much. John Meyer was already pushing it. Just imagine bleached college hair and photoshop embossed logos occupying the blank box above.

Recorded June 2010 in McCaren Park, Brooklyn, NY.

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“Punk traveling is for suckers.”


Yeah, we all know how romantic it is to wait 9 hours in a shitty hobo jungle for a freight train that won’t come, or lie through your teeth while hitchhiking with a wacky cardboard sign. Perhaps going on fake judge shows is the (new) Cadillac of punk travel. Punk traveling, indeed, is for suckers…

Told by L., this is the story - as well as a guide - on weaseling your way onto faux criminal justice shows. Needless to say the experience wasn’t quite what they expected, but sneaking X’d-up hands onto national TV makes everything worth it. 

Recorded in Brooklyn, July 2010, background noise courtesy of Boneshakers - who, by the way, has a new AC unit. 

Also, I had to pull the last story down per request of the interviewee. Some things are understandably too candid. 

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Sometimes you just have to tell a lie about John Mayer to look cool in front of your younger cousin. Sometimes it haunts you for years. 

Recorded by Jenny in Michigan and left on my voicemail, April, 2010

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“Joseph Densmore I loved you”

From Michelle Barton (mashedlovewithsoy). A first crush memory, which I think is absolutely poignant. I suppose things don’t change much.  

(this post was reblogged from mashedlovewithsoy)
Played 225 times
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It’s Spring, Let’s Get Nocturnal 

So at 538 Johnson we’ve been hosting these intense “erotic story nights,” which get pretty out of control. Of course I can’t and shouldn’t record a lot of the primo ones, but here are some good non-fiction selections from last night’s event:

1) 3 short stories of a (then) 15 year old boy named Kentucky Fried Cruelty.Com and his failed attempts at losing his virginity

2) an ode to curvaceous hipster girls and the unfortunate aspects of wearing gym shorts, by Justin Fritz

3) a coy-but-not-so-coy rooftop oral sex (and more) story by Mallory, complete with the memorable line, “the rocks and driftwood weren’t the only things getting wet.”

By the way, Mallory is starting a DIY zine project, Nocturnal Admissions, and is taking submissions. And by the way, Chris was not yet named “Kentucky Fried Cruelty.Com” when the above-mentioned events took place. Just thought it was a nice factoid.

Recorded March 12, 2010, Brooklyn, NY

Here’s to spring being here, and Tumblr not letting me upload linked audio files mysteriously for the past week and a half. Anyone else running into a Terms of Service errors?